The Advent series concludes with a reflection on love, emphasising its divine nature, exemplified by Jesus’s birth. True love is derived from God and challenges worldly definitions.
When I decided to do an Advent series, I realised it would summarise everything I had discussed since starting this blog. I won’t go in-depth to end the series because I already have a post dedicated to the last theme: love.
I went to church on Christmas day, and during his homily, the priest said something that stuck with me. I can’t recall precisely who he quoted, but he said that Jesus’s birth and life were God’s love personified. I felt such comfort after hearing it.
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. -John 3:16
We probably all know John 3:16. It has been imprinted in my brain since childhood. Jesus’ birth fulfilled God’s promise of a Saviour. I want you to picture someone filled with so much love for you that they would give you something so precious to them for your sake. Is that not beautiful to think about? God sets the standard for what love truly is. It comes as no surprise that love is a fruit of the Spirit. In fact, these last two weeks’ themes of peace and joy are also gifts of the Spirit. God is so intentional.
We have the world’s definition of what these three things should be, but they will never come close to what God intended them to be for us. Without the knowledge of God, I can guarantee that we only grasp fleetingly what we think love, joy, and peace are.
That said, here is the love God calls us to embody.
How can you show God’s love to someone today? Let me know in the comments below.
When faced with challenges, quitting can seem appealing. Yet, perseverance is essential for achieving meaningful goals. Doubt and fear of failure often hinder progress; the key lies in developing habits that foster resilience. Embrace small steps, seek support, and remain patient, understanding that success requires time and effort. Keep moving forward.
Have you ever started something meaningful, only to find yourself ready to quit as soon as things got tough? The discomfort feels unbearable, the progress seems slow, and the voice in your head whispers, “Maybe this isn’t worth it.” It’s easy to retreat, to fall back into what’s comfortable, and to let doubt win. But what if I told you that those moments of struggle are where breakthroughs begin—and quitting is precisely what the enemy wants you to do?
In this post, we’ll explore why it’s so tempting to give up when the road gets hard, how to silence the lies of insecurity, and how building resilience through habits can help you keep moving forward, even when the journey feels overwhelming.
The Lies That Lead to Quitting
One of the enemy’s greatest tactics is filling our minds with lies—subtle whispers of doubt, insecurity, and fear that cloud our vision and make us question whether we’re capable. When you start working toward a God-given purpose, the devil doesn’t sit idly by. He doesn’t attack plans that aren’t significant; he focuses on those with meaning, those aligned with God’s will.
One of the enemy’s biggest lies is that “you’re not enough.” Insecurity blinds us to the victories we’ve already won. You might be making progress, taking steps forward, and achieving things you once prayed for—but insecurity makes it hard to see these wins. Instead, you focus on what’s left to accomplish, magnifying your flaws and mistakes. The enemy plants doubt to make you think you’re not succeeding when, in fact, you are. If you give in to these lies, you risk slipping back into the comfort zone where he wants you, mistaking temporary relief for true healing.
Remember this: failure is not defeat; quitting is. The enemy knows that if he can make you quit, he wins. But when you persevere, even in the face of failure, you’re stepping into God’s purpose for your life.
The Fear of Failure: A Bigger Obstacle Than Failure Itself
Have you ever noticed how the fear of failure is often worse than failure itself? The anticipation of what might go wrong keeps us paralyzed. We play out worst-case scenarios in our minds, convincing ourselves that the risk isn’t worth it. But here’s the thing: failure isn’t the end—it’s part of the process.
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” -Thomas Edison
The fear of failure stops us from trying, robbing us of opportunities to grow and learn.
Proverbs 24:16 encourages us with this truth: “For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again.” Falling isn’t the issue—it’s staying down that holds us back. What matters most is your willingness to get back up and keep going.
Are You Under Attack or Stuck in a Habit?
When things get tough, it’s easy to feel like you’re under attack. And sometimes, you might be. The enemy often targets areas of your life that are tied to your God-given purpose. But not every obstacle is an attack; some challenges are the result of habits we’ve developed over time.
Ask yourself:
Am I under attack, or am I stuck in a habit?: If you find yourself quitting every time things get hard, it might be a pattern, not a spiritual battle. Quitting becomes a habit when we let discomfort dictate our actions. The good news is that habits can be broken and replaced with healthier ones.
Am I constantly running when things get hard, or is this a rare instance?: It’s important to evaluate your response to challenges. If quitting is your go-to response, it’s time to create new habits that help you push through instead of giving up.
Building Habits That Cultivate Perseverance
If habits are what’s holding you back, the key to overcoming them is intentionality. Perseverance isn’t a trait you’re born with—it’s a skill you develop over time. Here are some steps to help you build habits that foster resilience:
1. Focus on the long-term reward. Good things take time, and nothing worth having comes easily. Shift your perspective from immediate discomfort to the long-term benefits of staying the course. Galatians 6:9 reminds us, “Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Trust that your hard work will pay off in God’s perfect timing.
2. Replace negative self-talk with truth. When doubt creeps in, counter it with God’s promises. Write down affirming scriptures like Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me,” and repeat them when you feel like giving up.
3. Take small, consistent steps. Big goals can feel overwhelming, but breaking them into smaller, manageable steps makes them achievable. Celebrate each small victory along the way as a reminder of your progress.
4. Surround yourself with support. Remember, you are not meant to do this alone. Community is essential when you’re striving for growth. Surround yourself with people who encourage you, pray for you, and hold you accountable when you feel like giving up. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us, “Two are better than one… If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”
5. Pray for strength and discernment. When you feel weak, turn to God for the strength to keep going. Ask Him to help you discern whether your struggle is an attack or a habit and to guide you toward perseverance. James 1:5 promises that God gives wisdom generously to those who ask.
Time Will Tell: The Power of Patience
Success doesn’t happen overnight; healing, growth, or achieving a goal requires patience. It’s easy to feel discouraged when progress feels slow, but time will tell. Consistency and persistence over time reveal the fruit of your labour.
When you feel like quitting, remind yourself why you started. Is your goal aligned with a greater purpose? Is the discomfort you’re feeling now worth the reward that’s waiting on the other side? Trust the process, and know that every step forward—no matter how small—is progress.
Conclusion: Choosing to Persevere
Quitting might feel easy in the moment, but the cost of giving up is far greater than the discomfort of perseverance. The devil wants you to quit because he knows what’s on the other side of your persistence: victory, growth, and purpose. When you feel like giving up, remember that failure isn’t the end—quitting is.
Ask yourself:
Are you under attack, or are you stuck in a habit?
Are you letting fear hold you back, or are you willing to trust God and take the next step?
When the lies creep in, counter them with the truth. When insecurity tries to blind you to your victories, remind yourself how far you’ve come. The journey may be challenging, but good things take time, and something worth having comes with effort.
Reflection Questions:
Are there areas in your life where you’ve been tempted to quit because of discomfort or fear?
What habits might be holding you back from persevering through challenges?
How can you start building habits that encourage resilience and persistence?
Call to Action: This week, identify one area where you’ve been tempted to quit. Instead of giving up, take one small step forward and invite God into your journey. Share your thoughts or experiences in the comments—let’s encourage one another to keep moving forward!
Love and faith are intertwined risks that require vulnerability, yet they offer profound fulfilment. Both can lead to personal growth, deeper connections, and a meaningful life. Avoiding these risks might shield us from pain but also deprive us of joy and richness. Embracing love and faith enriches our lives despite uncertainties.
Love and faith—two of the most powerful forces in life, yet both involve stepping into the unknown. At their core, love and faith are both risks. They ask us to open our hearts, to trust in something beyond ourselves, and to give without guarantees of what we’ll receive in return. But why are love and faith so intertwined with risk, and why are they worth embracing despite the potential for disappointment?
The Risk of Love: Opening Your Heart Without Guarantees
What if the two things that could bring the most fulfilment to your life—love and faith—were also the riskiest decisions you’ll ever make?
To love someone, whether it’s a partner, friend, or family member, requires vulnerability. Love isn’t just about the romantic gestures or the warm feelings we get when things are going well. It’s about offering your heart to someone else with no certainty about how it will be treated. We’ve all heard the saying, “Love is a risk,” but what does that really mean?
When we love someone, we risk being hurt, misunderstood or let down. There’s always the chance that the love we give won’t be returned in the way we hope, or that the person we love will change or walk away, leaving us with wounds and heartache. But despite these risks, we continue to love. Why? Because love, even with all its uncertainties, brings immense beauty, joy, and connection into our lives.
The Risk of Faith: Trusting What You Cannot See
Just like love, faith requires a deep sense of trust. But while love is often directed toward other people, faith is rooted in trusting something greater than ourselves—whether it’s God, a higher purpose, or the belief that everything will work out in the end. And this, too, is a risk.
Faith asks us to believe in things we cannot see and to trust in promises that haven’t yet come to pass. It’s the risk of stepping out into the unknown, of following a path when the outcome isn’t clear. Hebrews 11:1 defines faith as “confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” But let’s be honest—living by faith isn’t always easy. It’s often filled with doubts, waiting, and the fear that things won’t turn out the way we planned.
Faith doesn’t come with guarantees. There are moments when you’ll wonder if your prayers are being heard and if the promises you’re holding onto will ever be fulfilled. You risk disappointment, delay, and confusion. But just as with love, the risk of faith is outweighed by the potential for transformation.
Love and Faith: Why They’re Both Worth the Risk
So, why take the risk of love and faith? Why put your heart on the line for something that might let you down? Because, despite the uncertainties, love and faith are the two wings that lift our lives, allowing us to soar above the ordinary and touch the heights of joy, connection, and purpose.
1. Love and faith are like fertile soil that grows resilience.
Love and faith are not just feelings; they are growth experiences. They stretch us beyond our comfort zones, making us stronger and more compassionate. Love, like a plant reaching for sunlight, grows through patience, kindness, and the ability to weather the sunshine and the storms. Faith, like roots pushing deep into the earth, builds a foundation of strength and resilience, especially when the winds of life are rough. In the end, we stand taller and stronger than before.
2. They create connections as rivers carve their way through valleys.
Love and faith are not just personal experiences; they are about connection. Love connects us deeply with others, forging relationships that are like rivers winding their way through valleys, nourishing the landscape of our lives. Faith connects us to God, offering peace and direction like a lighthouse guiding us home through the fog. Together, they weave bonds that sustain us through trials, bringing moments of stillness and clarity in a chaotic world.
3. They make life feel more vivid and meaningful, like stepping into full colour.
Without love and faith, life can feel like a series of greys and muted tones. Love and faith bring colour and dimension, filling life with purpose, joy, and depth. Love paints our days in vibrant hues of connection and warmth, while faith adds depth and shadows that shape our understanding of who we are and why we’re here. Together, they create a masterpiece, showing us life’s beauty in all its fullness.
By embracing the risks of love and faith, we’re invited into a richly textured and deeply felt life—a life that, despite its uncertainties, offers rewards that are well worth the journey.
The Dangers of Avoiding the Risks
Choosing not to love or not to have faith might protect us from pain in the short term, but it comes with its own consequences. When we refuse to risk love, we build walls around our hearts. We might keep the hurt out, but we also keep out the joy, fulfilment, and deep connection that love brings. Similarly, when we refuse to have faith, we limit ourselves to what we can control, missing out on the peace and possibilities that come with trusting something greater than ourselves.
It’s like living in a fortress. You’re safe from the storms but also cut off from the beauty of the world outside. Avoiding risk may keep you comfortable, but it also keeps you from fully experiencing life’s greatest blessings.
How to Embrace the Risks of Love and Faith
Be open to vulnerability: Loving and having faith both require vulnerability. You must be willing to open your heart, trust, and accept that you don’t have control over everything. It’s okay to feel afraid but don’t let that fear keep you from experiencing the beauty of love and faith.
Let go of perfection: Neither love nor faith requires perfection. You don’t have to be perfect in your relationships or in your spiritual journey. The important thing is showing up, doing your best, and allowing yourself to learn and grow along the way.
Lean on community: Both love and faith flourish when a supportive community surrounds us. Build relationships with people who encourage you to love deeply and live faithfully. In times of doubt, those relationships can help strengthen your resolve.
Trust the process: Both love and faith require patience and endurance. There will be moments when you want to give up because the journey feels too difficult or the outcome too uncertain. Trust that the process shapes you into a stronger, more compassionate person.
Conclusion: The Rewards of Risk
Love and faith are not for the faint of heart. They ask us to take chances, to trust without guarantees, and to give of ourselves even when it’s hard. But the risks are worth it. When we choose to love, we experience the fullness of human connection. When we choose to have faith, we find peace and purpose even in the face of uncertainty.
The greatest blessings in life often come when we step out of our comfort zones and embrace the unknown. So, take the risk. Love deeply. Believe fiercely. The rewards are greater than any fear that may hold you back.
Reflection Questions:
In what areas do you hesitate to risk love or faith?
How can you embrace vulnerability in your relationships and faith journey?
What is one step you can take today to open yourself up to the risks of love or faith?
Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below. Let’s support each other in taking these beautiful risks!
When life gets overwhelming, we often rely on familiar coping mechanisms to shield us from pain, but not all of them lead to healing. We aren’t meant to fight our battles alone. True healing begins when we set aside pride, reach out for support, and intentionally face our struggles.
We all have coping mechanisms that we turn to when life gets overwhelming—some healthy, like prayer or exercise, and others not so much, like isolating ourselves or numbing the pain with distractions. When things aren’t going how we want, we gravitate toward what’s familiar because it feels safe and comfortable. But here’s the hard truth: what feels familiar isn’t always best for us. While we might believe we can handle things alone, the reality is that no one is meant to walk through struggles by themselves.
Why We Turn to Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
When we face pain or disappointment, our first instinct is often to protect ourselves. Maybe it’s turning on autopilot and staying busy to avoid thinking about what’s hurting us. Perhaps it’s shutting people out because we don’t want to feel vulnerable. We lean on these habits because they’re comfortable. They’re our defence mechanisms against feeling weak or out of control.
But succumbing to these habits can be dangerous. We end up numbing our emotions, pushing away people who want to help, and shutting off parts of ourselves that need to be heard and healed. Over time, what started as a way to cope becomes a destructive pattern that can wreak havoc on our lives.
The Danger of Isolation: Why We Can’t Do It Alone
There’s a common misconception that we can handle everything on our own, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. The Bible clearly shows us that we are not meant to be alone. In Genesis 2:18, God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” This statement goes beyond the context of marriage—it’s a foundational truth about human nature. We were created for connection, for community, for support.
When we try to fight our “demons” alone, we set ourselves up for failure. It’s like trying to lift a heavy weight without a spotter—it’s only a matter of time before we buckle under the pressure. This is why isolation is so dangerous. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us, “Two are better than one… If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” We weren’t designed to carry our burdens alone, and pride often stands in the way of us reaching out for help.
Pride: The Barrier to Healing
Pride keeps us from accepting help from others and traps our pain deep within.
Have you ever found yourself saying, “I don’t need anyone’s help”? I have. During tough seasons, I would put on a brave face, insisting I could handle everything. But all that did was bury my pain deeper and isolate me from people who could have helped me heal.
Pride tells us that needing support is a weakness. LIES! Reaching out for help is an act of courage, not weakness. When we allow pride to keep us from asking for support, we prolong our suffering and prevent ourselves from experiencing the healing that comes through connection.
Suppression Leads to Survival Mode
When we refuse to face our pain, we end up suppressing it—burying it deep and pretending it’s not there. But suppressed emotions don’t go away. They simmer under the surface and show up in unexpected ways, often when we least expect them. Maybe it’s snapping at a friend over something trivial or feeling overwhelmed by simple tasks. This happens when we live in “survival mode”—we’re constantly on edge, bracing for the next emotional hit because deep down, we know we haven’t dealt with what’s really happening.
Over time, suppression can lead to burnout, anxiety, and even physical symptoms. We become experts at functioning on the outside, but we’re falling apart on the inside. Psalm 34:18 reminds us, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” God doesn’t want us to suppress our pain. He invites us to bring it to Him, to let Him carry our burdens, and to lean on others who can support us.
When Unresolved Pain Spreads: Healing is Contagious, but So Is Hurt
If we don’t deal with our pain, it doesn’t just go away. It spreads into other areas of our lives. Have you ever noticed how an unresolved issue at work can affect your mood at home? Or how a difficult family relationship make you irritable and defensive in other friendships? This is because pain that isn’t addressed becomes contagious. It leaks out into our relationships, our work, and our health.
“Time heals all wounds” is a popular saying, but it’s a myth. Time alone doesn’t heal anything—intentionality does. We can’t just sit back and hope that our pain will eventually fade away. We have to be active participants in our healing. That means facing our emotions head-on and doing the hard work of processing them with the help of others.
Steps to Move Out of Isolation and into Healing
So, how do we break the cycle of isolation and face our pain with courage? Here are some practical steps to get started:
Acknowledge your need for support: Admit that you can’t do this alone. This isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a step toward healing. Take a moment to pray, asking God to guide you toward people who can support you this season.
Reach out and connect: Take the first step to connect, whether it’s a friend, family member, counsellor, or support group. Ecclesiastes 4:12 reminds us, “A cord of three strands is not easily broken.” When we invite others into our healing, we become stronger.
Be honest about your struggles: Vulnerability is hard but necessary. Share what you’re going through honestly, without fear of judgment. Sometimes, simply speaking our pain out loud is the first step toward freedom.
Identify your unhealthy coping mechanisms: Take note of the habits you turn to when you’re stressed or hurting. Are you isolating, numbing, or suppressing? Recognize these patterns and ask yourself, “What am I trying to avoid?”
Replace harmful coping mechanisms with healthy ones: Find healthier ways to process your emotions through journaling, prayer, exercise, or speaking with a trusted friend or therapist. Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Let others support and guide you.
Conclusion: We Heal in Community
None of us will ever fully heal until we realize we need support. God created us for connection, community, and relationships that build us up when we struggle. We can’t keep numbing and running from our pain because, at some point, it will catch up. Healing requires facing what we’re going through head-on, and it takes intentionality on our part.
So, if you’re struggling, remember: You don’t have to fight alone. God is with you, and there are people who want to support you. Healing is not a solo journey. It’s a process we walk through together, step by step, day by day.
Reflection Questions:
What unhealthy coping mechanisms do you turn to when you’re stressed or hurting?
Who in your life can you reach out to for support today?
How has pride kept you from seeking help in the past, and how can you overcome it moving forward?
Take the First Step
If you’ve been struggling alone, I encourage you to take that first step today. Reach out to someone you trust. Ask for prayer, share your story, or even just let them know you’re struggling. Don’t let pride keep you isolated—healing happens in community. Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. Let’s support one another in the journey toward wholeness.
By leaning into community and trusting God’s guidance, we can break free from isolation and step into the fullness of healing He has for us.
The essence of love extends beyond feelings; it involves intentional actions rooted in selflessness and understanding. Breaking down 1 Corinthians 13 reveals true love encompasses patience, kindness, and forgiveness. Effective communication and adapting to one’s partner’s love language are vital, fostering deeper connection and ensuring both partners feel valued and fulfilled.
One of the most challenging yet transformative lessons I’ve had to learn is the true nature of love. Love isn’t just about feelings; it’s an intentional, often sacrificial act that requires a deeper understanding of ourselves and our partners. For me, breaking down 1 Corinthians 13 was the key to this realisation. I came across a sermon that left my eyes wide open. It’s linked below.
1 Corinthians 13: A Blueprint for Love in Relationships
In 1 Corinthians 13, the Apostle Paul offers a profound description of love. He writes, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.” These verses are often quoted at weddings, but they hold even more meaning when applied to the complexities of day-to-day relationships. True love isn’t just about grand gestures or romantic moments; it’s about showing patience, kindness, humility, and forgiveness when things get tough.
When we measure our relationships against these qualities, we realise how much we still have to learn. I thought I knew what love was, but I didn’t fully understand the selflessness it requires—loving someone for who they are, not just for how they make me feel.
Loving Your Partner the Way They Want to Be Loved
One of the biggest misconceptions in relationships is that love comes naturally and that we should automatically know how to love one another. While certain things like respect, kindness, and consideration are fundamental, the truth is that we’re not mind readers. What one person considers love might not align with their partner’s needs or expectations. This is why it’s crucial to love your partner how they want to be loved, not just how you prefer to show love.
This was a hard lesson for me to learn. I used to believe that my way of expressing love—through acts of service and words of affirmation—was enough. I would cook meals, offer encouraging words, and assume I was doing everything right. But I wasn’t asking my partner what they needed from me. They craved quality time and physical touch, which I often neglected because I was focused on showing love my way, not their way. We tend to assume our love language is universal, but it’s not. Love requires communication—ask your partner what makes them feel valued, seen, and cherished, and then act on that.
“Ask, and you shall receive.” This principle applies not just to prayer but also to relationships. When you express your needs clearly and ask your partner how they feel loved, you open the door to a deeper, more fulfilling connection. And when both people know better, they can do better.
Pitfalls of Miscommunication and Assumptions
Miscommunication is one of the biggest relationship pitfalls. We often make assumptions about what our partner should know or feel without ever expressing it clearly. I learned this the hard way when I felt hurt by something my partner did, yet I never told them why. I expected them to “just know” they had upset me. But when we leave our feelings unsaid, we create space for resentment to grow.
In relationships, it’s essential to avoid making assumptions. Assuming our partner can read our minds, we set ourselves up for disappointment. Likewise, thinking we know what they need without asking can lead to unmet expectations and hurt feelings. Clear communication is the foundation of love—it’s not about being right but understanding each other better.
The Importance of Communication: Learning to Love Better
I also used to believe that I was doing everything right if my intentions were good. But the truth is, we all have shortcomings in our love, and we only recognize them when we allow God to search and purify our hearts. For me, this was a turning point. When I asked God to reveal areas where I could grow, He showed me that while I wasn’t wrong in my approach, there was much more to learn. He “clocked” me, as they say!
It’s not that I didn’t know love, but I didn’t fully grasp what it truly entails—the ongoing work, the humility, the grace.
A Thin Line Between Love and Hate
When love is used as a bargaining tool, it becomes transactional, and this conditional approach can lead to deep emotional pain when the “rules” of love are broken. Love, by nature, is supposed to be a safe space where trust, vulnerability, and mutual care thrive. However, when someone uses love to manipulate or control, it creates an imbalance of power, shifting the relationship into a fragile space where affection is given and withheld as leverage. This leads directly to the concept of “a thin line between love and hate.” The shift from love to hate can be rapid when one feels betrayed or used, as the emotional investment in love is high, making any breach of trust or manipulation feel like a deep personal wound.
It hurts so much when these rules are broken because genuine love is built on trust and openness. When that foundation is shattered, the emotional fallout is a betrayal of our most intimate feelings. The line between love and hate becomes thinner when expectations aren’t met, or love is taken advantage of, turning once beautiful emotions into resentment. The hurt runs deep because, in a sense, we expect love to be unconditional, and when it’s not, it feels like a rejection of the very essence of who we are.
Be careful not to view love as a bargain. Give it freely without expecting anything in return.
Putting It Into Practice: The Journey of Loving Better
In my own life, learning this lesson wasn’t easy. I fell victim to worldly patterns—keeping score or retreating into pride. But I’ve found that when I love according to God’s standards, the peace and growth that follow are far more rewarding.
Here are some practical steps I’ve learned through my journey to love more intentionally:
Ask, don’t assume. Take time to ask your partner how they feel most loved and heard. You’ll be surprised how much more connected you feel when you love them in ways that resonate with them. Example: If your partner feels loved through quality time, plan a date night where you’re fully present. Leave the phone behind, engage in meaningful conversation, and show them their time matters to you.
Practice humility. Pride often blocks true intimacy. When disagreements arise, pause and ask yourself if you’re more focused on being right or loving. Example: In moments of conflict, instead of reacting immediately, take a breath and respond with empathy. Ask your partner how they feel and tell them you care about their emotions.
Forgive as God forgives. Don’t keep score or hold grudges. Love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5), and neither should we. If we want to experience God’s grace in our relationships, we must extend that same grace to our partner. Example: The next time your partner makes a mistake, address the issue at hand instead of bringing up past hurts with a clean slate. Approach it from a place of love and understanding.
Check in regularly. Love is not a one-time decision; it’s an ongoing commitment. Make it a habit to check in with your partner about how things are going and whether their needs are being met. Example: Set aside a weekly or monthly time to discuss your relationship. Ask open-ended questions like, “How can I support you better?” or “Is there anything we can work on together?”
The World vs. God’s Definition of Love
In today’s culture, we’re often taught to keep score, be petty, and “get even” when we feel wronged. Social media encourages the idea that relationships should be easy, and if they’re not, it’s time to move on. But God’s definition of love is radically different. In Mark 12:31, Jesus teaches us that the greatest commandment is to love—love unconditionally, love sacrificially, and love without keeping a record of wrongs.
God doesn’t hold our sins against us. When Jesus died on the cross, He paid the ransom for all our mistakes, giving us a fresh start. If God can forgive us completely, we can extend that same forgiveness and grace to those we love. This isn’t about ignoring boundaries or tolerating abuse; it’s about choosing to love with the same grace we’ve been given. Forgiveness is not just an act but a crucial element in our relationships, allowing us to love more deeply and unconditionally.
Conclusion: Learning to Love with Intention
Learning to love better is a journey, not a destination. It requires constant self-reflection, communication, and a willingness to grow. When we align our love with God’s definition—patient, kind, humble, and forgiving—we improve our relationships and experience deeper intimacy and fulfilment.
Remember these key takeaways:
Love your partner how they want to be loved. Ask them directly what makes them feel cherished.
Communicate openly. Don’t assume your partner knows what you need or how you think—express it.
Forgive freely. Don’t keep score; approach your partner with grace and understanding.
Keep learning. Relationships evolve, and so should your approach to love. It’s essential to adapt to changes in a relationship. Regularly check in with your partner to grow together. By following these principles, we can transform our relationships from transactional love to intentional love—the kind that reflects God’s grace and brings true fulfilment.
Reflection Questions
Take a few moments to reflect on your relationships:
What is your love language, and have you communicated it to your partner?
How do you show love in your relationships, and does it align with how your partner wants to be loved?
What assumptions have you made in the past that may have led to miscommunication? How can you address these moving forward?
Call to Action
Have you ever experienced a breakthrough in your relationship by asking your partner what they need instead of assuming? Share your story in the comments below! Let’s learn from each other and grow together in love.
Love Language Quiz
If you’re unsure of your love language, take this quick quiz to discover how you and your partner can best show and receive love. Understanding your love language can strengthen your relationship and bring joy and connection to your daily lives.
No one is coming to save you—and that’s where your power lies. True healing comes when you stop waiting for someone else to fix things and take full responsibility for your life. By stepping out of victimhood and into empowerment, you become the creator of your transformation.
When we experience pain, loss, or trauma, it’s easy to wait for someone else to step in and rescue us. We think, “If only someone would help me, then I could heal.” But here’s a harsh truth: no one is coming to save you. While that might sound daunting, it’s actually empowering. In continuing our journey from Healing Mindset: Transforming Trauma, we’re diving deeper into how we often fall into patterns of victimhood—and how taking full ownership of our healing is the only way to break free.
The Drama Triangle: A Trap That Keeps Us Stuck
One of the ways we get stuck is by falling into what’s called the Drama Triangle, a concept developed by Stephen Karpman. This triangle consists of three roles we often assume in times of distress:
The Drama Triangle
Victim: We feel powerless and blame others or our circumstances for our pain.
Rescuer/Hero: We try to save others or expect someone else to save us, which avoids personal responsibility.
Persecutor/Villain: We blame or criticize others for our suffering, creating a cycle of resentment and frustration.
Does this sound familiar? It’s easy to fall into these roles, but they keep us stuck in a loop of helplessness and blame. The Victim role feels particularly seductive when life gets hard. I know this firsthand—I used to wait for someone to come along and “fix” things for me. But that waiting never brought me closer to healing.
Take a moment to reflect: Have you ever found yourself in one of these roles? Maybe you’ve expected someone else to “rescue” you from your problems. How has that worked out? Often, the longer we stay in the Drama Triangle, the more frustrated we become.
Breaking Free: Stepping Into the Role of Creator
When we accept the truth that no one is coming to save us, we realize something powerful: we have the ability to save ourselves. This shift from being a Victim to becoming a Creator of our lives is where healing begins.
I remember a time in my life when I was stuck in the Victim role. After an injury altered my career path, I felt lost and hopeless, constantly waiting for someone or something to pull me out of the situation. But it wasn’t until I accepted that I was the only one who could change my story that I began to heal. By shifting my mindset, I found a new passion in healthcare administration, and my life became more prosperous because of that decision.
“Trauma victims cannot recover until they become familiar with and befriend the sensations in their bodies.”– Dr. Bessel van der Kolk.
Key Takeaways for Taking Responsibility
Ready to step out of the Drama Triangle and into a place of empowerment? Here are some practical steps to guide you along the way:
Recognize the patterns: Become aware of when you’re slipping into the roles of Victim, Rescuer, or Persecutor. Awareness is the first step toward breaking the cycle.
Shift your focus from problems to solutions: Instead of focusing on what’s wrong, ask yourself, “What can I do to change my situation?” A solution-based mindset empowers you to take action.
Accept that healing is your responsibility: No one can do your inner work. Once you acknowledge this, you reclaim control over your healing journey.
Set small, actionable goals: Start with simple steps, like journaling your emotions, seeking support from a therapist, or practising self-compassion. Progress happens in small, consistent actions.
Surround yourself with supportive people: While no one can save you, having a community that encourages and uplifts you is essential. Find people who support your growth, not those who keep you stuck.
Shifting Your Mindset: From Victim to Empowered Creator
Moving from Victim to Creator doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process that requires self-awareness and intentional action. But every step forward is a step toward freedom.
As Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychologist, famously said, “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” This insight is a powerful reminder that even when our external circumstances feel out of control, we still hold the power to change how we respond.
Taking Ownership: The Path to Healing
When we stop waiting for someone to save us, we unlock the power to save ourselves. Healing doesn’t come from outside sources—it comes from within. Whether you’re healing from trauma, recovering from loss, or working through pain, the journey begins with your decision to take responsibility for your life.
Here are some additional expert insights to keep in mind:
Dr. Gabor Maté, an expert in trauma, teaches that healing requires us to confront and take responsibility for the emotions we’ve been avoiding. He says, “The essence of trauma is disconnection from ourselves.” Healing is reconnecting with our inner world and taking responsibility for how we move forward.
Brene Brown, in her research on vulnerability and courage, reminds us that “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it.” Taking responsibility for our healing means owning our story, no matter how difficult it might be.
How to Reclaim Your Power
To help guide you on this journey, here are some concrete steps you can start taking today:
Identify where you are in the Drama Triangle: Reflect on whether you’re playing the role of Victim, Rescuer, or Persecutor and how these roles might keep you stuck.
Shift from Victim to Creator: Begin to see yourself as the Creator of your own life. This shift can start with small actions—take responsibility for responding to challenges.
Create a plan for healing: Outline specific steps you can take to start healing. Whether seeking therapy, practising mindfulness, or confronting past emotions, make a plan and stick to it.
Surround yourself with positive influences: Seek out people who empower you rather than those who reinforce the roles of the Drama Triangle. Your environment can have a huge impact on your growth.
Celebrate progress, not perfection: Healing isn’t linear. There will be ups and downs, but every step forward is progress. Celebrate your wins, no matter how small.
Specific Resources for Healing and Empowerment
If you’re looking for additional support as you navigate your healing journey, here are some excellent resources:
The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk: This book offers a deep dive into understanding trauma and how it affects both the body and mind.
When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress by Dr. Gabor Maté: In this book, Maté explores the connection between trauma, stress, and physical health and offers tools for recovery.
Rising Strong by Brene Brown: Brown’s work on vulnerability and resilience provides powerful insights into owning our story and finding strength through struggle.
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl: This classic book highlights the power of finding meaning and purpose even in the most challenging circumstances.
Healing Is a Choice by Stephen Arterburn: Arterburn offers practical steps for breaking free from the patterns that keep us from healing, emphasizing the power of personal responsibility.
You Are Your Own Hero
The reality that no one is coming to save you can feel overwhelming, but it’s also incredibly freeing. When you accept this truth, you reclaim your power to create your own life. Stepping out of the Drama Triangle and into the role of Creator is the key to your healing journey.
Now, I leave you with this: What’s one small step you can take today to move from Victim to Creator? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments—I’d love to hear how you’re reclaiming your power and stepping into your role as the hero of your own story.
Life often surprises us with challenges like breakups and loss, reminding us that our reactions matter most while we can’t control events. Healing is a personal responsibility that requires shifting mindsets and taking ownership of our journey. Trusting in God’s process can lead to restoration and growth, making every step towards healing significant.
Life has a way of surprising us. Just when we think we have everything under control, something happens—a breakup, a loss, a painful experience—that leaves us feeling unsteady. While we can’t control these events, how we respond makes all the difference. “10% of our lives are things that happen to us, and 90% is how we react” is a powerful reminder that we are responsible for our healing and growth.
Healing is Our Responsibility
It’s natural to want to point fingers when life throws us curveballs. I remember a time when I felt deeply hurt by someone I trusted, and for a while, I believed that if they had acted differently, I wouldn’t feel so broken. But eventually, I realized that while they may have caused the initial pain, I was responsible for what happened next.
Blaming others keeps us trapped in a cycle of hurt. When we fixate on what happened to us, we give away our power to heal. Healing, after all, is a personal journey. As much as we’d love for others to fix things for us, the truth is, it’s up to us to move forward.
This is where faith plays a pivotal role. In 1 Peter 5:6-10, we are called to “humble ourselves under God’s mighty hand,” so that in due time, He may lift us. This isn’t about pretending the hurt isn’t there—it’s about acknowledging that while we can’t control everything, God can. It’s about trusting in His timing for our healing. When we humbly place our struggles in His hands, we release the weight of what we cannot change and allow Him to guide us through restoration.
Taking Ownership: Moving Forward Instead of Blaming
The beginning of this season of my life was rough! I had a choice: I could wallow in disappointment or find a new way forward. While the initial pain and hurt weren’t something I could control, my response to it was. Instead of feeling defeated, I chose to develop a deeper relationship with God and pursue other interests, and that decision has brought more fulfilment than I ever imagined.
This experience taught me that clinging to old ways, especially when they don’t yield results, can prevent us from seeing new opportunities. When our current approach to healing—whether it’s avoidance, denial, or resentment—doesn’t work, it’s time to take a new direction.
1 Peter 5:6-10 comes into play here again, reassuring that when we humble ourselves and trust in God’s process, we will eventually be lifted. This idea of “lifting up” isn’t just about relief from pain but about rising to new heights—places we couldn’t have imagined if we stayed stuck in our hurt. The path to healing may require a shift in direction, but that change can lead to greater purpose and growth.
The Power of Perspective: Shifting Negative Mindsets
Have you ever walked into a situation expecting the worst, only to find that things turned out exactly how you imagined? That’s the power of mindset. When we think negatively, we limit our opportunities for growth and healing.
I’ve seen this in my own life. During particularly tough times, I would convince myself that nothing good could come out of the situation. That mindset didn’t just limit my growth—it stopped it altogether. It wasn’t until I shifted my perspective, choosing to see setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth, that I began to heal.
In the same way, we can approach trauma and pain with a mindset of defeat or with a mindset of resilience. The Bible reminds us that “after you have suffered a little while, God will restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you” (1 Peter 5:10). This verse holds a vital key to perspective—yes, suffering is part of the journey, but it is not the end. There is a promise of restoration if we are willing to trust in the process, and that promise can be our motivation to keep moving forward.
From Trauma to Triumph: Healing is a Choice
Trauma is not something we choose, but how we move forward from it is. According to Trauma is Not Your Fault, trauma often happens through no fault of our own. However, while trauma itself is beyond our control, healing from it is a conscious decision we must make.
I remember talking with someone who had experienced significant trauma in their life. They were angry, hurt, and, for a while, stuck in the belief that nothing would ever change. They believed their trauma defined them, and as a result, their life remained in a cycle of pain. But once they chose to seek help and shift their perspective, their healing journey began. It wasn’t instant, but they reclaimed their life by taking responsibility for their healing.
This process echoes the idea that while trauma is an unavoidable chapter in our lives, it doesn’t have to be the entire story. Healing is not easy—it often requires therapy, support from others, and deep self-reflection. But as we work through it, we begin to rebuild our lives, with trauma becoming a part of our past, not our future.
Action Steps: Embracing Change and Growth
So, how can we begin the process of healing and growth? Here are a few practical steps to help guide the journey:
Take ownership of your healing-Reflect on how you might be holding yourself back. Is there a part of you still waiting for someone else to make things right? Consider journaling about what healing looks like for you, and list a few small actions you can take to reclaim control of your life.
Change your mindset– Identify negative thoughts that may keep you stuck. One way to do this is through a simple exercise: replace every negative thought that enters your mind with a positive truth. For example, instead of thinking, “This situation is hopeless,” remind yourself, “There is always potential for growth, even in difficult circumstances.”
Seek guidance– Healing is not a journey you have to walk alone. Whether through prayer, counselling, or a trusted friend, having someone to talk to can make a difference. Speaking with a mentor helped me see my struggles in a new light, often pointing out strengths I didn’t realize I had.
Embrace discomfort– Growth rarely happens in comfort zones. Sometimes, the most remarkable healing comes when we allow ourselves to sit with uncomfortable emotions and trust that they are part of the process. Consider trying new activities like mindfulness meditation or taking up a physical exercise that challenges you—it’s a great way to build resilience and strengthen both body and mind.
Celebrate small wins– Healing is a journey; every step forward deserves recognition. Make a habit of acknowledging small victories, whether it’s a breakthrough in therapy, a shift in mindset, or simply a day where you feel lighter. These wins remind you that progress is possible, even when the road is long.
You Hold the Key to Your Healing
Life will always present us with challenges, but our true power lies in how we react. Healing doesn’t happen overnight, but every step we take toward taking ownership of our lives brings us closer to wholeness.
What’s your next step in healing? What’s one thing you can do today to reclaim control over your story? I invite you to share your experiences or insights in the comments—whether you’re just beginning your healing journey or are further along, your story might inspire someone else to take that next step toward wholeness.
“Owning our story can be hard, but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it.” -Brene Brown
Abby’s life took a turn in March 2022 when a back injury led to her medical discharge from the Army. Despite initial struggles and disappointment, she found purpose in her pain and embraced change. She appreciates the support of family, friends, and faith and looks forward to new opportunities. Abby also plans to share insights from her journey in future posts.
Two years ago, the trajectory of my life changed.
It was an early morning in March 2022, and I had just completed a physical fitness test in the scorching Kuwaiti heat. All was well until I tried to stand up after having breakfast some minutes later. I felt a searing pain in my lower back that stopped me dead in my tracks. I could not stand to my full height or sit back down. I was stuck. After many bouts of physical therapy, pain management, surgery, and everything you can think of, the Army has found me unfit for duty, and I will be medically discharged because I am not getting better.
I knew this would be the result, and while I had time to prepare and accept the decision, I can’t say that I am not a little disappointed. When I enlisted, I did so with the intention of doing twenty years. My injury prevented me from completing my first contract—five out of six years. Two have been spent in a Soldier Recovery Unit, away from my friends and family. I mourn the loss of a career I did not have a chance to explore and get to know my true potential. I mourn being unable to lead and help set the standards for women like me. I mourn the people I will leave behind.
The journey from then until now has not been easy. In the beginning, I was so angry, lost, depressed, and feeling sorry for myself. Over time, with the help of my faith, therapy, support from friends and family, and simply changing my outlook, I have found purpose in my pain. Don’t get me wrong; there are days when the pain is still so crippling that it feels like my body is working against me. Instead of letting the pain define me, I choose to be in control.
The person I am now is not the same person I was before my injury. I have changed for the better. I have grown, and I have learned so much that may not have happened had I not gotten hurt. I have met people who have made a lasting impact on my life. I have been focused on school, family, a career, and my future from here on out. I have never been more ready and confident to face the unknown.
Reflecting on this unexpected journey, I realize that life is a series of events, many of which we cannot control. The military deepened my resilience, discipline, and the importance of teamwork. These lessons are now more relevant than ever as I navigate this new chapter of my life. The skills I acquired during my service are transferable, and I am eager to apply them in new ways. I’ve discovered new passions and interests I might never have pursued without my injury.
My family and friends have been my rock throughout this ordeal. Their unwavering support has reminded me that I am not alone in this journey. My faith has also been a guiding light, giving me the strength to persevere and find meaning in my struggles. Each day is a testament to the power of faith, love, and determination.
Looking ahead, I am filled with anticipation and excitement. The path before me is uncharted, but it is also filled with endless possibilities. I am committed to making the most of every opportunity and to continuing my journey of growth and self-discovery. The experiences I have gained, the lessons I have learned, and the people I have met along the way have all contributed to shaping the person I am today.
In the coming posts, I will delve deeper into specific aspects of my journey, sharing insights and lessons learned. From coping with physical pain to finding new career paths, from the importance of mental health to the power of community, I hope to provide valuable perspectives that resonate with others facing similar challenges.
I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to my care team at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center, Fort Belvoir, and my civilian providers. Thank you for joining me on this journey.
Together, we can navigate the twists and turns of life, finding strength in our shared experiences and hope in the promise of tomorrow. Stay tuned for more.
Amid a difficult breakup, the writer confronts the challenge of true forgiveness. Through introspection and spiritual renewal, they realize the superficiality of their forgiveness and its impact on their relationships. Drawing from personal and religious insights, they acknowledge forgiveness as an ongoing process and share practical strategies for cultivating it.
Introspection is humbling but, at the same time, freeing.
A few months ago, I went through a breakup. I took it badly. Amid it, he told me he couldn’t forgive and forget, and I took it personally because I thought it was the opposite for me. I believed I had forgiven and forgotten. I was being a hypocrite. Using terms such as “you always” or “you never” indicates we have not forgiven. I was guilty of using these words. As much as I wanted to tell myself otherwise, how we truly feel on the inside always comes out when emotions are heightened. I had not forgiven. At least he was honest about how he felt. Kudos to him.
As I am on this journey of spiritual renewal, there are moments when I am hit by thoughts that leave me with no choice but to examine them deeply. This most recent one is forgiveness. I came across a book, “Forgiving What You Can’t Forget” by Lysa TerKeurst, and I immediately purchased it. Seeing the title instantly made me realise that I was struggling with forgiveness and that to be free from the hurt I was feeling, I needed to let go.
Before that, I thought I was leading by example and doing what God asks of us—praying for those who hurt us—and believe me, I have prayed. After realising my struggle, I asked myself, were those prayers a show, knowing that my heart harboured resentment towards that person, or were they sincere? Like I said earlier, introspection is very humbling.
One specific experience stands out. I remember an argument where my ex said something hurtful, and I retaliated by bringing up his past mistakes when I spoke about it with my friends. While I may not have said it to him specifically, it was clear then that my forgiveness was superficial. Instead of addressing the underlying hurt, I used it as ammunition. This realisation was painful but necessary for my growth.
There are many references in the Bible where God tells us to forgive. After all, the most outstanding example of forgiveness was God sending Jesus to die for our sins. How can I, a mere human, refuse to forgive those around me? Who am I to judge? I know how much it hurts, but when we hold on to feelings of betrayal, anger, hurt, pride, and defeat, they only fuel the fire of unforgiveness.
I have learned that forgiveness is a process. It’s ongoing. It’s intentional. It’s easy to say we forgive, but the key is doing the work afterwards and knowing how to navigate the emotions that arise when we are triggered positively. It’s knowing how not to secretly want the other person to hurt in the way that they hurt you. It’s knowing what it means to let go genuinely. That, my friends, is what it means to be intentional. I won’t lie. It’s hard. However, our wounds never heal when we hold on to all the negative feelings. Whenever a memory surfaces, and we view it from an earthly perspective, we inflict more damage on that wound, and it never heals.
“But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:15. There are so many times I have asked for our Father’s forgiveness, knowing that I have unforgiveness in my heart. Abby, be so for real!
I also realised that my inability to forgive had caused other relationships to fall apart. I said I forgave, but at the slightest inconvenience, I either threw it back in their faces or took it out on them in some other way. For instance, I often withdraw or become passive-aggressive with friends when old wounds are unintentionally reopened.
Here are a few practical strategies that have helped me cultivate forgiveness in my daily life:
Prayer and Meditation: These practices help center my thoughts and remind me of the bigger picture. They connect me with peace and purpose beyond my immediate emotions.
Mindfulness: Staying present helps me avoid ruminating on past hurts. It keeps me focused on the here and now, where I have the power to change my responses. When memories of betrayal overwhelm me, I take time to pray and meditate, which helps me bring about a feeling of calmness to see the situation with compassion rather than anger.
Seeking Counsel: Talking to a trusted friend or therapist can provide new perspectives and help me navigate complex emotions.
Practising Empathy: Seeing the situation from the other person’s perspective can soften my heart and open the door to forgiveness.
In addition to the Bible, various other traditions offer valuable insights on forgiveness. For example, Buddhist teachings emphasise releasing attachment to anger and resentment. They advocate for compassion towards oneself and others, recognising that everyone is on a path of growth and learning. Similarly, many Indigenous cultures view forgiveness as a communal act essential for restoring harmony and balance within the community.
Forgiveness is not about condoning hurtful actions but about freeing ourselves from the chains of resentment. It’s about healing and moving forward with a lighter heart. As I continue this journey, I strive to embrace forgiveness as a concept and a daily practice, one step at a time.
You are never too much and should never apologise for your ambitions, emotions, or standards. Hold on to your worth, and never lower your standards for anyone. Embrace your journey to self-love and acceptance, and know that the right person will see your worth and love you unconditionally. Keep believing in yourself.
You are never too much. Let me say that again. You are never too much. First, I want to start by saying I’m sorry. I’m sorry if someone made you feel less than, undeserving, worthless, or useless. I am sorry.
You were never and will ever be those things. It’s the person who made you feel all these things and left you questioning your sanity that was not enough. We all have standards for a reason. However far out of the park they are, we have them for a reason, and we should hold on dearly to them, especially if they are uncompromisable. There is always some truth to cliches. Do with them as you will. Never lower your standards for anyone.
The day you do so is the day you start losing yourself. I think we as women believe that when we have a lot going on for ourselves, are educated and beautiful, and have our heads screwed on tightly to our bodies that it will be hard to form relationships. Romantic ones, especially. I am here to tell you, sister, you’re mistaken. There is someone out there for whom you were made perfectly. Someone who will complement you and make the perfect companion. Just as God created Eve from Adam’s spare rib, so, too, did He create the person just for you.
As women, we pour so much of ourselves into relationships. When our cups run empty, it is so easy for men to move on to the next. We are then left shattered, lost and hurt. We anguish about the times wasted, knowing that when we first had that inclination to leave, we should have. Those are times that we will never get back. Don’t get me wrong, there is no problem with falling in love with potential. However, for potential to be fruitful, the other individual must be willing to change. They must be willing to learn and grow. If not, falling in love with the supposed potential we see will lead to nothing but failure.
You were probably told your ambitions were too big, your emotions too intense, and your standards too high. Never apologise for wanting more out of life, for expecting honesty and respect. It took a long time, but I eventually realised the problem was not with me. I was never too much. I was just right; the person I was with wasn’t enough to appreciate that. I am the prize, and you are, too.
It’s important to note, though, that your time was never wasted. You gave wholly of yourself because of the goodness of your heart. That is something they will never be able to take from you. As hard as it may seem at the moment to believe it, you are, without a doubt, wholeheartedly deserving of everything good that life has to offer. You will get it. The Lord will turn your pain into joy. The tears you cry today are watering the fruits you will bloom tomorrow.
Think of the lessons learnt, and the strength gained. Reflect on how you grew through the pain and what you discovered about your resilience. Every tear, every sleepless night, and every moment of doubt shapes you into a stronger, more empathetic, and wiser person. These experiences will make the right person value and cherish you for all you are.
Remember, you are never too much for the right person. The right person will see your worth, embrace your complexity, and love you unconditionally. They will support your dreams, respect your boundaries, and walk you through life’s challenges. They won’t make you feel you must diminish yourself to fit into their life. Instead, they will make you feel like you are more than enough, just as you are.
So, hold your head high and keep your standards firm. Trust that the right person will come into your life at the right time. And in the meantime, continue to love yourself fiercely, chase your dreams passionately, and never settle for anything less than you deserve. Also, realise that it’s okay for you to feel defeated. Allow yourself to feel the emotions. Do not suppress them. Let them out. Your story is far from over, and the best chapters are yet to come.
Your journey to self-love and acceptance is ongoing. Embrace it, learn from it, and let it guide you to the beautiful future that awaits you. You are strong, you are worthy, and you are never too much. Keep believing in yourself, and the right person will believe in you, too.
Authentically Abby 