Thoughts – Page 2 – Authentically Abby

Do You Want to Hear the Harsh Truth? No One is Coming to Save You

No one is coming to save you—and that’s where your power lies. True healing comes when you stop waiting for someone else to fix things and take full responsibility for your life. By stepping out of victimhood and into empowerment, you become the creator of your transformation.

When we experience pain, loss, or trauma, it’s easy to wait for someone else to step in and rescue us. We think, “If only someone would help me, then I could heal.” But here’s a harsh truth: no one is coming to save you. While that might sound daunting, it’s actually empowering. In continuing our journey from Healing Mindset: Transforming Trauma, we’re diving deeper into how we often fall into patterns of victimhood—and how taking full ownership of our healing is the only way to break free.

The Drama Triangle: A Trap That Keeps Us Stuck

One of the ways we get stuck is by falling into what’s called the Drama Triangle, a concept developed by Stephen Karpman. This triangle consists of three roles we often assume in times of distress:

Victim: We feel powerless and blame others or our circumstances for our pain.
Rescuer/Hero: We try to save others or expect someone else to save us, which avoids personal responsibility.
Persecutor/Villain: We blame or criticize others for our suffering, creating a cycle of resentment and frustration.

Does this sound familiar? It’s easy to fall into these roles, but they keep us stuck in a loop of helplessness and blame. The Victim role feels particularly seductive when life gets hard. I know this firsthand—I used to wait for someone to come along and “fix” things for me. But that waiting never brought me closer to healing.

Take a moment to reflect: Have you ever found yourself in one of these roles? Maybe you’ve expected someone else to “rescue” you from your problems. How has that worked out? Often, the longer we stay in the Drama Triangle, the more frustrated we become.

Breaking Free: Stepping Into the Role of Creator

When we accept the truth that no one is coming to save us, we realize something powerful: we have the ability to save ourselves. This shift from being a Victim to becoming a Creator of our lives is where healing begins.

I remember a time in my life when I was stuck in the Victim role. After an injury altered my career path, I felt lost and hopeless, constantly waiting for someone or something to pull me out of the situation. But it wasn’t until I accepted that I was the only one who could change my story that I began to heal. By shifting my mindset, I found a new passion in healthcare administration, and my life became more prosperous because of that decision.

“Trauma victims cannot recover until they become familiar with and befriend the sensations in their bodies.”– Dr. Bessel van der Kolk.

Key Takeaways for Taking Responsibility

Ready to step out of the Drama Triangle and into a place of empowerment? Here are some practical steps to guide you along the way:

Recognize the patterns: Become aware of when you’re slipping into the roles of Victim, Rescuer, or Persecutor. Awareness is the first step toward breaking the cycle.
Shift your focus from problems to solutions: Instead of focusing on what’s wrong, ask yourself, “What can I do to change my situation?” A solution-based mindset empowers you to take action.
Accept that healing is your responsibility: No one can do your inner work. Once you acknowledge this, you reclaim control over your healing journey.
Set small, actionable goals: Start with simple steps, like journaling your emotions, seeking support from a therapist, or practising self-compassion. Progress happens in small, consistent actions.
Surround yourself with supportive people: While no one can save you, having a community that encourages and uplifts you is essential. Find people who support your growth, not those who keep you stuck.

Shifting Your Mindset: From Victim to Empowered Creator

Moving from Victim to Creator doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process that requires self-awareness and intentional action. But every step forward is a step toward freedom.

As Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychologist, famously said, “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” This insight is a powerful reminder that even when our external circumstances feel out of control, we still hold the power to change how we respond.

Taking Ownership: The Path to Healing

When we stop waiting for someone to save us, we unlock the power to save ourselves. Healing doesn’t come from outside sources—it comes from within. Whether you’re healing from trauma, recovering from loss, or working through pain, the journey begins with your decision to take responsibility for your life.

Here are some additional expert insights to keep in mind:

Dr. Gabor Maté, an expert in trauma, teaches that healing requires us to confront and take responsibility for the emotions we’ve been avoiding. He says, “The essence of trauma is disconnection from ourselves.” Healing is reconnecting with our inner world and taking responsibility for how we move forward.
Brene Brown, in her research on vulnerability and courage, reminds us that “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it.” Taking responsibility for our healing means owning our story, no matter how difficult it might be.

How to Reclaim Your Power

To help guide you on this journey, here are some concrete steps you can start taking today:

Identify where you are in the Drama Triangle: Reflect on whether you’re playing the role of Victim, Rescuer, or Persecutor and how these roles might keep you stuck.
Shift from Victim to Creator: Begin to see yourself as the Creator of your own life. This shift can start with small actions—take responsibility for responding to challenges.
Create a plan for healing: Outline specific steps you can take to start healing. Whether seeking therapy, practising mindfulness, or confronting past emotions, make a plan and stick to it.
Surround yourself with positive influences: Seek out people who empower you rather than those who reinforce the roles of the Drama Triangle. Your environment can have a huge impact on your growth.
Celebrate progress, not perfection: Healing isn’t linear. There will be ups and downs, but every step forward is progress. Celebrate your wins, no matter how small.

Specific Resources for Healing and Empowerment

If you’re looking for additional support as you navigate your healing journey, here are some excellent resources:

The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk: This book offers a deep dive into understanding trauma and how it affects both the body and mind.
When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress by Dr. Gabor Maté: In this book, Maté explores the connection between trauma, stress, and physical health and offers tools for recovery.
Rising Strong by Brene Brown: Brown’s work on vulnerability and resilience provides powerful insights into owning our story and finding strength through struggle.
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl: This classic book highlights the power of finding meaning and purpose even in the most challenging circumstances.
Healing Is a Choice by Stephen Arterburn: Arterburn offers practical steps for breaking free from the patterns that keep us from healing, emphasizing the power of personal responsibility.

You Are Your Own Hero

The reality that no one is coming to save you can feel overwhelming, but it’s also incredibly freeing. When you accept this truth, you reclaim your power to create your own life. Stepping out of the Drama Triangle and into the role of Creator is the key to your healing journey.

Now, I leave you with this: What’s one small step you can take today to move from Victim to Creator? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments—I’d love to hear how you’re reclaiming your power and stepping into your role as the hero of your own story.

Until next time,
Abby

https://www.bringthedonuts.com/essays/the-drama-triangle/

Healing Mindset: Transforming Trauma

Life often surprises us with challenges like breakups and loss, reminding us that our reactions matter most while we can’t control events. Healing is a personal responsibility that requires shifting mindsets and taking ownership of our journey. Trusting in God’s process can lead to restoration and growth, making every step towards healing significant.

Life has a way of surprising us. Just when we think we have everything under control, something happens—a breakup, a loss, a painful experience—that leaves us feeling unsteady. While we can’t control these events, how we respond makes all the difference. “10% of our lives are things that happen to us, and 90% is how we react” is a powerful reminder that we are responsible for our healing and growth.

Healing is Our Responsibility

It’s natural to want to point fingers when life throws us curveballs. I remember a time when I felt deeply hurt by someone I trusted, and for a while, I believed that if they had acted differently, I wouldn’t feel so broken. But eventually, I realized that while they may have caused the initial pain, I was responsible for what happened next.

Blaming others keeps us trapped in a cycle of hurt. When we fixate on what happened to us, we give away our power to heal. Healing, after all, is a personal journey. As much as we’d love for others to fix things for us, the truth is, it’s up to us to move forward.

This is where faith plays a pivotal role. In 1 Peter 5:6-10, we are called to “humble ourselves under God’s mighty hand,” so that in due time, He may lift us. This isn’t about pretending the hurt isn’t there—it’s about acknowledging that while we can’t control everything, God can. It’s about trusting in His timing for our healing. When we humbly place our struggles in His hands, we release the weight of what we cannot change and allow Him to guide us through restoration.

Taking Ownership: Moving Forward Instead of Blaming

The beginning of this season of my life was rough! I had a choice: I could wallow in disappointment or find a new way forward. While the initial pain and hurt weren’t something I could control, my response to it was. Instead of feeling defeated, I chose to develop a deeper relationship with God and pursue other interests, and that decision has brought more fulfilment than I ever imagined.

This experience taught me that clinging to old ways, especially when they don’t yield results, can prevent us from seeing new opportunities. When our current approach to healing—whether it’s avoidance, denial, or resentment—doesn’t work, it’s time to take a new direction.

1 Peter 5:6-10 comes into play here again, reassuring that when we humble ourselves and trust in God’s process, we will eventually be lifted. This idea of “lifting up” isn’t just about relief from pain but about rising to new heights—places we couldn’t have imagined if we stayed stuck in our hurt. The path to healing may require a shift in direction, but that change can lead to greater purpose and growth.

The Power of Perspective: Shifting Negative Mindsets

Have you ever walked into a situation expecting the worst, only to find that things turned out exactly how you imagined? That’s the power of mindset. When we think negatively, we limit our opportunities for growth and healing.

I’ve seen this in my own life. During particularly tough times, I would convince myself that nothing good could come out of the situation. That mindset didn’t just limit my growth—it stopped it altogether. It wasn’t until I shifted my perspective, choosing to see setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth, that I began to heal.

In the same way, we can approach trauma and pain with a mindset of defeat or with a mindset of resilience. The Bible reminds us that “after you have suffered a little while, God will restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you” (1 Peter 5:10). This verse holds a vital key to perspective—yes, suffering is part of the journey, but it is not the end. There is a promise of restoration if we are willing to trust in the process, and that promise can be our motivation to keep moving forward.

From Trauma to Triumph: Healing is a Choice

Trauma is not something we choose, but how we move forward from it is. According to Trauma is Not Your Fault, trauma often happens through no fault of our own. However, while trauma itself is beyond our control, healing from it is a conscious decision we must make.

I remember talking with someone who had experienced significant trauma in their life. They were angry, hurt, and, for a while, stuck in the belief that nothing would ever change. They believed their trauma defined them, and as a result, their life remained in a cycle of pain. But once they chose to seek help and shift their perspective, their healing journey began. It wasn’t instant, but they reclaimed their life by taking responsibility for their healing.

This process echoes the idea that while trauma is an unavoidable chapter in our lives, it doesn’t have to be the entire story. Healing is not easy—it often requires therapy, support from others, and deep self-reflection. But as we work through it, we begin to rebuild our lives, with trauma becoming a part of our past, not our future.

Action Steps: Embracing Change and Growth

So, how can we begin the process of healing and growth? Here are a few practical steps to help guide the journey:

Take ownership of your healing-Reflect on how you might be holding yourself back. Is there a part of you still waiting for someone else to make things right? Consider journaling about what healing looks like for you, and list a few small actions you can take to reclaim control of your life.
Change your mindset– Identify negative thoughts that may keep you stuck. One way to do this is through a simple exercise: replace every negative thought that enters your mind with a positive truth. For example, instead of thinking, “This situation is hopeless,” remind yourself, “There is always potential for growth, even in difficult circumstances.”
Seek guidance– Healing is not a journey you have to walk alone. Whether through prayer, counselling, or a trusted friend, having someone to talk to can make a difference. Speaking with a mentor helped me see my struggles in a new light, often pointing out strengths I didn’t realize I had.
Embrace discomfort– Growth rarely happens in comfort zones. Sometimes, the most remarkable healing comes when we allow ourselves to sit with uncomfortable emotions and trust that they are part of the process. Consider trying new activities like mindfulness meditation or taking up a physical exercise that challenges you—it’s a great way to build resilience and strengthen both body and mind.
Celebrate small wins– Healing is a journey; every step forward deserves recognition. Make a habit of acknowledging small victories, whether it’s a breakthrough in therapy, a shift in mindset, or simply a day where you feel lighter. These wins remind you that progress is possible, even when the road is long.

You Hold the Key to Your Healing

Life will always present us with challenges, but our true power lies in how we react. Healing doesn’t happen overnight, but every step we take toward taking ownership of our lives brings us closer to wholeness.

What’s your next step in healing? What’s one thing you can do today to reclaim control over your story? I invite you to share your experiences or insights in the comments—whether you’re just beginning your healing journey or are further along, your story might inspire someone else to take that next step toward wholeness.

“Owning our story can be hard, but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it.” -Brene Brown

Click to access Trauma-Is-Not-Your-Fault.pdf

Until next time,
Abby

Finding Purpose in Unpredictability: Surrendering to God’s Plan

Letting go of our plans is not about giving up on our dreams but rather about being open to the idea that our lives may unfold in ways we never imagined, which can be good. It’s about consulting God in our decision-making and trusting His plans for us, which are ultimately for our good, even when they differ from our own.

A bad day, week, month or year is not indicative of a bad life. Our lives are not defined by temporary setbacks or moments of despair. It’s easy to get caught up in the negativity of our circumstances, allowing the weight of one difficult period to overshadow the broader narrative of our lives. Yet, this perspective encourages us to step back and see the bigger picture—our lives are a tapestry woven with challenges and triumphs, each thread contributing to the unique beauty of our story.

Focusing on the Wrong Things

It is so easy for us to focus on everything that is going wrong in our lives, so much so that it sucks the joy out of everything and everyone around us. However, like I said in prior posts, if our plans do not align with the ones God has for us, they will never come to life.

Faith and Comfort in Uncertainty

Last night, I had a dream, and in that dream, I kept repeating Jeremiah 29:11. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I woke up feeling comforted, knowing things would work out as they should. Faith provides comfort in times of uncertainty. This realization invites us to shift our focus from rigidly adhering to our plans to being open to the unfolding of God’s will in our lives. It’s a call to surrender—not in defeat but trust. Trust that the detours and delays we encounter are not obstacles but part of a more extraordinary design that we may not yet fully understand.

The Unpredictability of Life

In our journey through life, it’s natural to plan and set goals. We map out milestones, creating timelines that we hope will guide us toward the life we envision. However, life often unravels those plans, leading us down paths we never anticipated. This unpredictability can be unsettling, particularly for those comfortable with structure and control. Life is something we can’t plan for. It’s too unpredictable.

The Problem with Overplanning

It’s essential to recognise that while planning is not inherently wrong, it becomes problematic when we place our sense of worth and identity in achieving those plans. When we tie our happiness and self-worth to a specific timeline, we set ourselves up for disappointment and frustration when things don’t go as expected. This often leads to a cycle of comparison, where we measure our progress against that of others, forgetting that each of us is on a unique journey with its challenges and blessings.

Comparison Is the Thief of Joy

Comparison is a thief of joy. It blinds us to the blessings in our own lives and breeds discontentment. When we compare ourselves to others, we’re unfair to ourselves and the unique path that God has laid out for us. Our journeys are meant to be distinct, and the diversity of our experiences enriches the world around us. Imagine a world where everyone’s story was the same—how dull and unoriginal it would be! Our individual struggles, victories, and lessons we learn along the way make our stories worth telling.

My Own Experience with Setbacks

The realization that I would be losing my military career and battling depression and chronic pain was a time when everything seemed to be falling apart. I had planned my career meticulously. I worked tirelessly, sacrificing personal time and energy to achieve this goal, and lost it all within the blink of an eye. It felt like a massive failure. For weeks, I questioned my worth and the direction of my life.

Embracing God’s Plan

Letting go of our plans and embracing God’s plan for our lives is not easy. It requires humility, patience, and trust in God’s timing. But how do we know when to let go? The answer lies in our relationship with God. When we take our plans to Him in prayer, seeking His guidance and aligning our desires with His will, He provides the clarity and peace we need to move forward. God’s plans are rooted in love and designed to prosper us, not harm us. When we consult Him and remain open to His direction, we can rest assured that we are on the right path, even when it doesn’t look like what we initially envisioned.

Trusting God’s Timing

It’s important to remember that God’s timing is perfect, even when it doesn’t align with our own. What we perceive as delays or setbacks may be God’s way of preparing us for something greater. He may use these moments to teach us patience, strengthen our character, or redirect us towards a path leading to greater fulfilment and purpose. Therefore, we must learn to trust in the process, knowing that every step, even the difficult ones, is part of a divine plan for our good.

The Journey of Life

Life’s journey is filled with unexpected twists and turns, but this unpredictability is not something to fear. Instead, it’s an opportunity to deepen our trust in God and embrace the unique path He has laid for us. While making plans is natural, we must hold them loosely, always willing to submit them to God’s will. By doing so, we free ourselves from trying to control every aspect of our lives and open ourselves up to the possibility of something far greater than we could ever imagine.

Conclusion: Fret Not

So, fret not when things don’t go as planned. Remember that a bad day, week, month, or year is not indicative of a bad life. It’s merely a chapter in a much larger story that is still written by a loving God who has good plans for you. Trust in Him, and know that everything will work out as it should, in His perfect timing.

Until next time,
Abby

Understanding Forgiveness: The Journey to Spiritual Renewal and Healing

Amid a difficult breakup, the writer confronts the challenge of true forgiveness. Through introspection and spiritual renewal, they realize the superficiality of their forgiveness and its impact on their relationships. Drawing from personal and religious insights, they acknowledge forgiveness as an ongoing process and share practical strategies for cultivating it.

Introspection is humbling but, at the same time, freeing.

A few months ago, I went through a breakup. I took it badly. Amid it, he told me he couldn’t forgive and forget, and I took it personally because I thought it was the opposite for me. I believed I had forgiven and forgotten. I was being a hypocrite. Using terms such as “you always” or “you never” indicates we have not forgiven. I was guilty of using these words. As much as I wanted to tell myself otherwise, how we truly feel on the inside always comes out when emotions are heightened. I had not forgiven. At least he was honest about how he felt. Kudos to him.

As I am on this journey of spiritual renewal, there are moments when I am hit by thoughts that leave me with no choice but to examine them deeply. This most recent one is forgiveness. I came across a book, “Forgiving What You Can’t Forget” by Lysa TerKeurst, and I immediately purchased it. Seeing the title instantly made me realise that I was struggling with forgiveness and that to be free from the hurt I was feeling, I needed to let go.

Before that, I thought I was leading by example and doing what God asks of us—praying for those who hurt us—and believe me, I have prayed. After realising my struggle, I asked myself, were those prayers a show, knowing that my heart harboured resentment towards that person, or were they sincere? Like I said earlier, introspection is very humbling.

One specific experience stands out. I remember an argument where my ex said something hurtful, and I retaliated by bringing up his past mistakes when I spoke about it with my friends. While I may not have said it to him specifically, it was clear then that my forgiveness was superficial. Instead of addressing the underlying hurt, I used it as ammunition. This realisation was painful but necessary for my growth.

There are many references in the Bible where God tells us to forgive. After all, the most outstanding example of forgiveness was God sending Jesus to die for our sins. How can I, a mere human, refuse to forgive those around me? Who am I to judge? I know how much it hurts, but when we hold on to feelings of betrayal, anger, hurt, pride, and defeat, they only fuel the fire of unforgiveness.

I have learned that forgiveness is a process. It’s ongoing. It’s intentional. It’s easy to say we forgive, but the key is doing the work afterwards and knowing how to navigate the emotions that arise when we are triggered positively. It’s knowing how not to secretly want the other person to hurt in the way that they hurt you. It’s knowing what it means to let go genuinely. That, my friends, is what it means to be intentional. I won’t lie. It’s hard. However, our wounds never heal when we hold on to all the negative feelings. Whenever a memory surfaces, and we view it from an earthly perspective, we inflict more damage on that wound, and it never heals.

“But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:15. There are so many times I have asked for our Father’s forgiveness, knowing that I have unforgiveness in my heart. Abby, be so for real!

I also realised that my inability to forgive had caused other relationships to fall apart. I said I forgave, but at the slightest inconvenience, I either threw it back in their faces or took it out on them in some other way. For instance, I often withdraw or become passive-aggressive with friends when old wounds are unintentionally reopened.

Here are a few practical strategies that have helped me cultivate forgiveness in my daily life:

Prayer and Meditation: These practices help center my thoughts and remind me of the bigger picture. They connect me with peace and purpose beyond my immediate emotions.
Mindfulness: Staying present helps me avoid ruminating on past hurts. It keeps me focused on the here and now, where I have the power to change my responses. When memories of betrayal overwhelm me, I take time to pray and meditate, which helps me bring about a feeling of calmness to see the situation with compassion rather than anger.
Seeking Counsel: Talking to a trusted friend or therapist can provide new perspectives and help me navigate complex emotions.
Practising Empathy: Seeing the situation from the other person’s perspective can soften my heart and open the door to forgiveness.

In addition to the Bible, various other traditions offer valuable insights on forgiveness. For example, Buddhist teachings emphasise releasing attachment to anger and resentment. They advocate for compassion towards oneself and others, recognising that everyone is on a path of growth and learning. Similarly, many Indigenous cultures view forgiveness as a communal act essential for restoring harmony and balance within the community.

Forgiveness is not about condoning hurtful actions but about freeing ourselves from the chains of resentment. It’s about healing and moving forward with a lighter heart. As I continue this journey, I strive to embrace forgiveness as a concept and a daily practice, one step at a time.

Until next time,
Abby

Finding True Happiness and Healing Through the Lord

A personal journey of pain and faith, seeking solace in God and finding strength in a supportive community.

This is the second consecutive week I’ve felt compelled to write and post spontaneously, diverging from my prewritten and scheduled posts. This is a sign that the Lord is speaking to and guiding me. Once again, I heard a song that deeply moved me, resonating with my current state of mind and heart.

Last week was particularly challenging—not just a tough day, but a series of difficult days. I found myself crying at the most unexpected times. I’ve been pouring out my heart to God, telling Him how much it hurts. While I can try to pretend that I’m okay, the truth is that the pain is overwhelming. It hurts so deeply. There were moments when I felt hopeless, focusing only on the one thing that went wrong, overshadowing all the other areas where I was thriving. It’s difficult to celebrate my accomplishments when the pain seems all-consuming.

The Trap of Temporary Relief

Pain has a way of pulling us in, making it easy to give in to it or seek temporary relief. We might turn to alcohol, drugs, sex, or meaningless relationships, convincing ourselves that these will provide us with happiness and renewal. While these might offer fleeting comfort, they are not lasting solutions. True happiness, joy, and peace come from the Lord and are found within ourselves through Him.

Finding Strength in Faith

Lyrics from “Lead Me On” by Chandler Moore:

“I don’t know what season you’re in right now
I don’t know what giant you’re looking right now
But just let Him lead you on
Know it looks hard, I know it looks hard
Know it’s uncomfortable
But You can trust Him, just let Him lead you on
I didn’t know where else to go
I tried so many other options
But I’m left with Him, really walking by faith now”

These lyrics perfectly capture what I’m experiencing. It’s hard, and the temptation to let go and follow my path is strong. However, Ecclesiastes 3 reminds us that there is a time for everything. Rushing or skipping crucial parts of my healing process would only do me a disservice. So, I will cry as much as I need to because I trust that when the time is right, the Lord will fulfil His promises, just as He said.

Personal Insights and Practical Tips

Surrounding Myself with a Supportive Community: Leaning on a faith community has been crucial. Sharing my struggles with trusted friends and mentors allows me to receive their prayers, encouragement, and wisdom. Remembering that we don’t have to endure tough times alone is essential.
Meditative Prayer and Worship: I spend time in meditative prayer and worship, focusing on God’s presence and letting His peace wash over me. Worship songs like “Lead Me On” become prayers that soothe my soul and remind me of His constant presence.
Journaling My Prayers: I will incorporate journaling into my days. Writing down my thoughts and feelings may help me process my emotions and bring me closer to God. It will also remind me of His faithfulness when I look back and see how He has answered my prayers over time.

Embracing the Healing Process

There’s something humbling about admitting our struggles and turning to God in our darkest hours. In these times of desperation and raw honesty, we often find our most significant growth and transformation. The tears, the cries, and the feelings of brokenness are not signs of weakness but rather steps in the healing process that God is orchestrating in our lives. Each tear shed is a prayer, each cry a call for divine intervention, and each moment of pain an opportunity for God to demonstrate His boundless love and grace.

Moving Forward with Faith

It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing our pain to our achievements, wondering why we can’t seem to find joy in our successes. But God’s plan for us often involves walking through the valleys to appreciate the mountaintops fully. Many significant figures, from David to Job, experienced immense suffering in the Bible before finding redemption and fulfilment. Their stories remind us that our journeys, with all their ups and downs, are part of a larger narrative that God is writing.

The world offers many distractions and temporary fixes, but they are just that—temporary. True, lasting fulfilment comes from a deep, abiding relationship with God. He is the source of our strength, the anchor in our storms, and the healer of our hearts. When we seek Him earnestly, we find a peace that surpasses all understanding, a joy that endures even in the face of adversity.

As I reflect on these truths, I’m reminded of Isaiah 40:31: “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” This promise is a beacon of hope, a reminder that our struggles are temporary and that with God, we will emerge stronger and more resilient.

So, to anyone reading this who is also going through a tough time, know that you are not alone. Trust in God’s timing and His plan for your life. Allow yourself to grieve, to cry, and to heal. And remember, when the time is right, the Lord will bring you out of the valley and into the light, just as He has promised.

Let us continue to walk by faith, leaning on His understanding and not our own. Let us allow His love to fill the cracks in our hearts and His peace to calm the storms in our minds. Together, we can find the strength to keep moving forward, knowing that God is with us every step of the way.

Until next time,
Abby

Conquering Dreadful Mental Images: Strategies for Relief

I think some, if not all of us, have an image that will forever be imprinted on our minds. An image that brings a sinking feeling within our stomachs. An image you can see as clear as day whether your eyes are opened or closed. An image that brings you complete dread. You know the one I am talking about, don’t you? You wish you could reach into your consciousness and snatch it from its contents. Erase it completely.

I didn’t think this would be my first post when I decided to take blogging seriously again, but here I am. The question is, how do you get rid of this image? How do you stop your mind from allowing it to slip into your consciousness when your defenses are down? I have some thoughts, although they have yet to be tried and proven by me, but I’ll be sure to provide an update.

It is believed that talking about the things that bother you will set you free. It helps to release all the pent-up emotions, and if you’re in a mindset to receive feedback, it just might help. Just thinking about mentioning this to my therapist is weighing me down. I can feel my body gearing up for fight/flight. And while she may not be the cure-all, she can help with getting to the root cause, which will allow this image to not have power over me.

Distraction is also an idea that pops into my mind. Doing things that keep the mind actively engaged and concentrating on other things is sure to prevent the wayward thoughts and that crippling image from popping up. Refocus.

This brings me to my next point: meditation. Meditation practices can improve focus, reduce stress, and enhance emotional regulation. I have tried meditative techniques before, but my mind always refused to be quiet. They say it becomes easier with practice, though. I’ll give it another try.

I am no expert, and I am always open to feedback. We all have something that constantly burdens us. The most important thing to do is to give ourselves grace. Giving oneself grace involves practicing self-compassion and forgiveness. It’s about acknowledging that mistakes are part of learning and not overly critical of oneself. How we conquer these thoughts and take back our power will be freeing.

Until next time,
Abby